Monday 25 October 2010

The year of the illnesses.

Since Maya began child care back in January she has been sick nearly every fortnight with something new each time.  Prior to child care Maya was rarely sick and I thought Maya had a very good immune system.  But at child care she is bombarded with illnesses constantly (I often see kids there coughing or with runny noses) and her poor little body can't fight them all off.

I feel like I have spent half my time at the doctors this year.  For me and for her.  Because I also seem to catch everything she catches.  I feel like we have spent more time being sick than being well.  And when I visit our doctor yet again, they always remind me that children at child care get many, many more illnesses than children who are at home.  Basically there is nothing unusual about the amount of illnesses Maya has had since starting child care.

The barrage of illnesses has been so exhausting.  It seems like when she's well then I am sick and if she's sick then I am well.  When she's sick she is miserable and hard to keep happy and wakes often during the night.  When I'm sick she's usually well and wants to play and go outside and do things, while I just want to go to bed and hide under the covers all day.

Our doctor tries to reassure me by reminding me with each visit that children in child care get about twenty illnesses per year (TWENTY!!!!!!!) but once they reach primary school they have a state of the art immune system and rarely get sick.  Which doesn't really make me feel any better right now.

Now if only I could own shares at my doctors and the pharmacy I reckon I'd be rich.

Sunday 24 October 2010

Second Birthday Party.

We decided to host Maya's second birthday party at our new place complete with BBQ lunch and ice cream cake. Here's some pictures from the day:

Party Clothes
Presents
Ice cream cake.
Time to blow out the candles

Thursday 21 October 2010

The beginning of the cancer removal.

So my mother had exploratory surgery last week and during that time they operated to save one of her kidneys and remove the massive tumour.  I didn't even realise the tumour was encroaching on her kidney or just how dire her situation was until after the operation.  They did manage to save the kidney and declared the operation a success.

However, after more tests they have found that the cancerous cells are within her bladder lining and given the size of the tumour and the rate at which the cancer must be growing, their only solution is to remove the bladder entirely.  They don't believe the cancer has spread outside of the bladder and so removing her bladder would essentially ensure that all of the cancer is removed.

On the one hand all of this sounds very reassuring and the prognosis is very good.

But they are removing her bladder.

I don't know about you but I kind of like having my bladder.  I mean, yes it's not something I really think about on a regular basis or anything, but now that I am thinking about it, I really like having my bladder.

My mother will have to live the rest of her life with a catheter in place and a bag for storage.

Right now she is feeling very low about the outcome.  And while we should all be happy that the prognosis is not worse, it is hard right now to imagine life without such an important organ.

Monday 18 October 2010

Second Birthday.

For Maya's first birthday I didn't buy her any presents.  I knew that she wouldn't have any concept of presents or parties or birthdays.  The party was for me not her.

But this year, I couldn't resist buying presents.
Maya was so excited when she saw her presents.  She enjoyed unwrapping them and seeing what was inside.

We got her a watch because she's always looking at mine and wanting to wear it.  Now she has one of her own.  We also bought her some clothes and magnets of farm animals for the fridge as well as a sandpit.
On Maya's actual birthday we took her to a local farm where you can feed and pat the animals.  But her favourite part was a ride on a kid's train.


Tuesday 12 October 2010

Sunday 10 October 2010

Happy Second Birthday Maya.

To my dearest Maya,

In your second year I have watched you grow more independent, something you have always sought.  You desire to do things on your own and have mastered many amazing skills.  
This year you have learnt to walk and talk and you run everywhere and talk nonstop.   
I have loved watching you grow and develop and I am glad I can be there to support you along the way  It hasn’t always been easy and this year when I went back to work and you started child care you really missed me and I really missed you.  Then you started getting illnesses every second week and whenever you were well I was sick.  But the hugs and kisses I receive and hearing your giggle and seeing your smile make everything OK.   
I love you so much my gorgeous Maya.  I wish you the very best of birthdays and look forward to celebrating many more with you.   
All my love, Mum xx

Friday 8 October 2010

The big C.

So my mother finally saw a specialist and had tests done and the bladder cancer is bigger than expected.  She is in a lot of pain and losing a lot of blood.  She's weak, tired and finding it difficult to cope.

Everything seems to be taking such a long time.  It took six weeks to see a specialist.  Another week to have tests done.  And then a three week wait to have exploratory surgery (which is next week).

This will be followed by another wait until she can have the cancer removed.

Saturday 2 October 2010

Vertigo

I found this description of vertigo on Meniere's Resources Inc

During a vertigo event, what usually happens is the brain is telling the eye to move in response to bad information it receives from a dysfunctional balance system. These eye movements would be helpful at keeping balance if that information from the inner ear were accurate, but since it's false information it produces the appearance that everything is spinning which reinforces the bad balance information.

I am still suffering from the occasional vertigo attack.  Though I was attack free for a few months, around July they started up again.  However, while the vertigo still starts off violently it seems to 'slow down' and not last as long as before.  The attacks are still highly unpleasant but not unbearable any more.

I wish I knew that this was actually a good sign and that the illness had taken its course.  But unfortunately some people have a spate of milder vertigo, only to be followed by violent attacks again.  So I cannot be certain that the unbearable vertigo, that plagued me last year, is over now forever.  It is still a scary time for me and with each vertigo attack there is disappointment that they are still occurring.

However, having the regular, milder attacks of vertigo hasn't damaged my confidence as much as last year.  I am still leading a fairly active, normal life, except on the occasions of vertigo when I need to take it easy.  But I can still somewhat function through these new level of attacks and get myself to a safe seat and watch over Maya.  Last year the attacks were so bad I was on the floor and unable to get up for an hour or more.

I really hope that I will never again experience those unbearable attacks.  I hope that my body is adjusting to this awful illness and it will remain manageable.  And I hope someday this illness will be a bad memory and not something that affects my life any more.